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You are a simple bard invited to perform before a bored and grumpy king. Your hands tremble as they clutch your humble instrument. You think to yourself "This is it. This is where all the hard work pays off. This is a bard's time to shine!"
At the expense of getting started with your performance right away, you opt for an introduction. Surely this king cares who you are, or anything about you at all, for that matter!
Always eager to think of ways to ingratiate yourself in front of superiors, you notice a spot on the king's shoe. You hock a mean one into your trusty rag and set to work. This crusty old king will warm up to you yet!
You wander into the city streets to prepare for your questing. You wonder if you might want to stock up on several extra large dragon corpse satchels just to be on the safe side. But maybe you should start with the armor first. You think you'll stop by the smith's.
You set about looking for the local codsmith, or groincobbler as otherwise known sometimes. You are stunned to find a treasure trove! Cod Palace, the busy cod enthusiast's one-stop cod solution!
Sweet Jesus! You've found it. "Hull of the Flagship", it's called. It even has ruffled trim and a bell afixed. It's perfect. Alas, you do not have the golds for it.
You offer your hat. The codsmith inspects its worth as potential material for a new cod piece. It shows promise, but it simply is not worth the same as the Hull of the Flagship. He refuses.
Yes! You and your magnificent piece are alone together at last! Except for some vagrants camping in the alley. They ask if you can spare any cods, but you politely decline.
You don the cod piece. Now this is the kind of comfort that is only possible with a top of the line luxury cod. The majesty of your union with the piece is heralded.
Your subjects instantly prostrate themselves before the bearer of the great piece. They would do anything for you. They would take a crossbow bolt for your groin. In Cod they trust.
You are clearly making progress here. Any adventurer would be lucky to begin a quest with your recent acquisitions. You can almost taste the dragon bounty already.
Just a moment... you start to wonder if the attire of your servants is altogether appropriate? Their groins seem [i:4c2db633f1]conspicuously[/i:4c2db633f1] barren.
You did it! You are free of the tyranny that would deprive your groins of a snug, fashionable cradling.
You cavort with carefree abandon, not the least bit concerned with the flopping about of the nether-regions. Nor are you concerned with any vengeful codsmiths who you are quite sure probably didn't follow you.
You lead your party outside the town to begin what you can only assume will be an insane dragon murderfest. Your two companions are able-bodied, loyal, and clearly very intelligent. You wonder what their names are. You are too caught up in your bold leadership duties to ask though, and you figure you will probably just make up some stupid names for them later on.
Where would you like to go to find some dragons to slay?
Hey check it out. Every week we'll be revealing some new troll characters from Hiveswap until Act 2 is out. Follow the Troll Call here, and meet the first two here. Expect a few more surprises like this to drop in coming weeks.
