KARKAT: BUT SERIOUSLY, I STILL DO WANT TO HELP MAKE A DIFFERENCE IN THIS BATTLE SOMEHOW!
KANAYA: I Know You Do
KARKAT: LOOK, I COMPLETELY ADMIT. I'M SHIT.
KARKAT: I'M THE SHIT THEY RESERVE FOR THE SMELLIEST TOILET WHEN IT COMES TO FIGHTING ABILITY.
KARKAT: ALL THAT SMACK TALK BETWEEN ME AND VRISKA ABOUT MY USELESSNESS, THAT WASN'T EVEN SOME SNAPPY LITTLE FARCE, WHERE WE ALL RIDE KARKAT'S CROTCH BANDEAU FOR A LIVELY CHUCKLE.
KARKAT: IT WAS JUST SOME BASIC BOILERPLATE INTERLOCUTION THAT WAS EXACTLY ON THE FUCKING LEVEL.
KARKAT: I'M NOT A GOD TIER, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT? NEITHER ARE YOU, AND NEITHER IS TEREZI.
KARKAT: BUT YOU'RE BOTH GREAT, AND DEADLY AS SHIT. IT'S NO EXCUSE.
KARKAT: I'VE NEVER BEEN ANY GOOD, AND IT TOOK ME A LONG TIME TO COME TO TERMS WITH HOW DELUDED I WAS ABOUT THAT.
KARKAT: THE ONLY REASON WE ENDED UP WINNING OUR GAME WAS THAT EVERYONE ELSE WAS ABLE TO PICK UP THE SLACK FOR ME.
KARKAT: PRETTY MUCH ALL I DID WAS SPEND A FEW WEEKS SHOUTING AT EVERYBODY.
KARKAT: I NEVER TOLD ANYONE THIS BUT...
KARKAT: EVEN WHEN I BEAT MY DENIZEN
KARKAT: I'M PRETTY SURE THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE I GOT THE ONE RESERVED FOR THE WEAKEST PLAYERS.
KARKAT: LIKE A SPECIAL ONE.
KARKAT: YOU KNOW HOW THERE'S THAT SUPPOSEDLY RARE ONE THAT ONLY REALLY STRONG PLAYERS GET... IT HAS SOME WEIRD FUCKING NAME.
KARKAT: I'M PRETTY SURE MINE WAS LIKE THAT. BUT JUST THE OPPOSITE.
KARKAT: REALLY, I NEVER SAID *ANYTHING* ABOUT THIS BECAUSE IT WAS SO EMBARRASSING, BUT
KARKAT: WHEN I GOT TO HIM, HE WAS... WEIRDLY SMALL??
KARKAT: LIKE JUST REALLY SMALL.
KARKAT: AND HE MUMBLES HIS CHOICE SHIT WHICH OF COURSE I COMPLETELY IGNORE, AND HE SEEMS TO KNOW I WILL.
KARKAT: I CAN HEAR IT IN HIS VOICE. HE KNOWS I WON'T CARE, HE CAN SENSE MY CONTEMPT, HE CAN SENSE HOW SMALL AND PITIFUL I FEEL, AND BECAUSE HE'S LIKE ALL KNOWING AND SHIT, HE'S *FACTORED THIS IN*.
KARKAT: ON SOME LEVEL, I THINK I UNDERSTOOD ALL THIS, AND IT JUST MADE ME FURIOUS.
KARKAT: SO I KILLED HIM.
KARKAT: AND IT WAS TOO EASY. EVEN FOR ME, IT WAS EASY.
KARKAT: I REMEMBER THINKING "WHAT THE FUCK?" AFTER THE FINAL BLOW.
KARKAT: SO YEAH, I'VE BEEN PRETTY SURE I GOT THE "TRAINING DENIZEN" EVER SINCE. IT WAS JUST A MATTER OF ADMITTING IT TO MYSELF.
KARKAT: ACTUALLY, AS DUMB AS IT SOUNDS...
KARKAT: I THINK I'M *STILL* NOT COMFORTABLE WITH PEOPLE KNOWING THAT FACT. IT STILL FEELS HUMILIATING.
KARKAT: WOULD YOU MIND NOT TELLING ANYONE, KANAYA?
KANAYA: Ill Stay Quiet
KARKAT: BUT YEAH, MY UTTERLY TRAGIC LAMENESS ATTRIBUTE NOTWITHSTANDING, I'D STILL LIKE TO CONTRIBUTE.
KARKAT: I KNOW IT WON'T COUNT FOR MUCH.
KARKAT: I MIGHT EVEN GET IN THE WAY OF SOMEBODY COMPETENT.
KARKAT: BUT IT MATTERS TO ME, TO PUT EVERYTHING ON THE LINE, FOR ALL THE RIGHT REASONS THIS TIME.
KARKAT: NOT TO PROVE I'M STRONG OR AWESOME OR ANYTHING.
KARKAT: THE OPPOSITE REALLY... TO PUT MYSELF OUT THERE KNOWING PERFECTLY WELL I'M NOT.
KARKAT: I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO EARN THE RIGHT TO INHERIT THIS UNIVERSE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.
KARKAT: NOT JUST GET DRAGGED INTO IT ON THE LOOSE FABRIC OF EVERYONE'S FUCKING PAJAMAS.
KARKAT: IT ALSO FEELS IMPORTANT TO JUST
KARKAT: I DON'T KNOW
KARKAT: STAND THERE WITH MY FRIENDS.
KARKAT: THEY'RE RISKING THEIR LIVES, AND THEY MAY BE MORE SUPERNATURALLY RESILIENT OR WHATEVER, BUT HEY.
KARKAT: I SHOULD BE RISKING MINE TOO.
KARKAT: TO AT LEAST SHOW I'M THERE WITH THEM.
KARKAT: AND WHO KNOWS, MAYBE A MOMENT WILL PRESENT ITSELF...
KARKAT: WHERE I CAN DO SOMETHING IMPORTANT.
KARKAT: LIKE NUDGE SOMEONE OUT OF THE WAY OF A RANDOM FLAMING FUCKBALL JUST IN TIME.
KARKAT: OR SOME OTHER SMALL THING ACTUALLY WITHIN MY ABILITY.
KARKAT: MAYBE I'LL DIE IN THE PROCESS OF SAVING SOMEONE MORE CRUCIAL TO VICTORY?
KARKAT: IF THAT'S WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A PART OF THIS, SO BE IT.
KARKAT: I'M IN.
KANAYA: Thats Why Youre Our Leader Karkat
KARKAT: I'M NOT YOUR FUCKING LEADER!!!
KANAYA: Statements Like That Are Also Why Youre Our Leader
KARKAT: NO, I DON'T ACCEPT THAT.
KANAYA: You Have To
KARKAT: WHAT
KARKAT: WHY?!
KARKAT: NO I DON'T.
KARKAT: LOOK, WE *JUST* ESTABLISHED THIS BACK ON THE PAD.
KARKAT: I'M NOT A LEADER ANYMORE. END OF STORY.
KANAYA: That Isnt What Echidna Said
KARKAT: ??????