JAKE: (Brain ghost dirk!)
JAKE: (*Sob...*)
JAKE: (Youve got to do something!)
DIRK: Sorry, man. I'd like to help you out.
DIRK: But I'm not real.
JAKE: (Dag nabbit!)
JAKE: (*Sniffle...*)
JAKE: (Are you sure theres nothing you can do?)
DIRK: I'm only as real as your ability to believe in me.
JAKE: (But i do believe in you.)
JAKE: (I believe in everybody!)
DIRK: Yeah right.
DIRK: You've never really believed in anyone your whole life, and you know it.
DIRK: Everything's always about you. Don't you remember? You already had this epiphany, dingus.
DIRK: I could only become truly real if you ever managed to harness those bomb as shit hope powers she mentioned.
DIRK: Then again, if you actually did that, you wouldn't even need my help.
JAKE: (But i cant!)
JAKE: (And i dont want to be a pawn in her lecherous baby making pastry empire.)
JANE: Jake.
JAKE: (*Blubber...*)
DIRK: Will you stop crying?
DIRK: It's reflecting poorly on both of us.
JAKE: (Sorry.)
JAKE: (*Sniff.*)
DIRK: Hey.
DIRK: Did you shave your legs?
JAKE: (No i think the magic god tier fire burned it all off...)
DIRK: God damn.
DIRK: They're so smooth.
DIRK: A car could swerve outta control on those gams.
JAKE: (I know. Its really weird.)
JAKE: (Speaking of legs...)
DIRK: Yeah. The little poofy asshole pants. I know.
JAKE: (Is that really what youre wearing now?)
DIRK: Yeah.
JAKE: (Sweet!)
DIRK: No.
JANE: JAKE.
JANE: To whom are you talking?
JAKE: Brain ghost dirk.
JANE: Brain... Ghost Dirk?
JAKE: Yes.
JANE: You are lying.
JAKE: No im not!
JANE: Brain Ghost Dirk sounds almost as fake as he is completely made up.
JAKE: But...
JAKE: *Snivel.*
JAKE: *WEEEEEEEEEEP!*
JANE: Oh, for goodness' sake.