CCG: HEY, ARE YOU THERE?
FUTURE carcinoGeneticist [FCG] 10 MINUTES FROM NOW responded to memo.
FCG: FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK.
CCG: OH...
CCG: HEY
FCG: I CAN'T
FCG: I JUST CANNOT
FCG: *FUCKING*
FCG: ***BELIEVE***
FCG: I HAVE TO GO THROUGH ALL THIS BULLSHIT AGAIN WITH YOU/ME.
FCG: WHAT THE FUCK MADE ME THINK THIS WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA???
CCG: DUDE, WHAT'S WITH THE TEXT?
FCG: UUUUUGH.
FCG: WHY DON'T YOU TELL ME!
FCG: I JUST HAVE THIS INCREDIBLE PREMONITION YOU'RE ABOUT TO ANYWAY.
CCG: WHY THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW WHY YOU CHANGED YOUR TEXT RED!
CCG: WE DON'T DO THAT. THE SHOWY, SELF-ABSORBED "PAINT YOUR TEXT IN YOUR BLOOD COLOR" THING. OR EYE COLOR, OR WHATEVER.
CCG: IT'S FOR ATTENTION-GREEDY, INSECURE LOSERS.
FCG: SURE IS!
CCG: HMM.
FCG: ?????? <- SARCASTIC WONDER.
CCG: I'M JUST THINKING
CCG: THIS REALLY MAKES OUR CONVERSATIONS EASIER TO READ.
CCG: REMEMBER THOSE INSANE BLOCKS OF GRAY ANGRY TEXT WE USED TO WRITE TOGETHER.
CCG: WHAT WAS THAT
CCG: LIKE HALF A SWEEP AGO ALREADY?
CCG: IS IT WEIRD THAT I'M ACTUALLY LOOKING BACK ON ALL THAT INSANITY WITH A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF FONDNESS?
CCG: AT LEAST SHIT WAS HAPPENING.
CCG: IT'S SO BORING OUT HERE. AND LIVING WITH THE HUMANS IS JUST GETTING KIND OF
CCG: WEIRD.
CCG: ANYWAY, THIS IS ACTUALLY A LOT MORE DECIPHERABLE. MAYBE YOU'RE ON TO SOMETHING.
FCG: WELL HEY, CHECK IT OUT: SHIT JUST GOT NOSTALGIC.
FCG: LOOK AT THAT, I'M FEELING MORE SENTIMENTAL ABOUT THIS MORONIC CONVERSATION ALREADY.
CCG: OK, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO GO FROM ZERO TO DOUCHE LIKE IN THE BLINK OF A FUCKING GLANCE NUGGET.
FCG: THE BLINK OF A GLANCE NUGGET?? I'VE BEEN AT THIS FOR TEN MINUTES ALREADY. AND COUNTING!
CCG: I JUST THINK YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN ON TO SOMETHING WITH THE RED TEXT. I WAS TRYING TO PAY YOU A COMPLIMENT YOU ANTAGONIZING FUCK.
CCG: I MEAN, WE ONLY EVER GOT IN THE HABIT OF TYPING IN GRAY TO HIDE OUR BLOOD COLOR, RIGHT?
CCG: AND LIKE, 1) EVERYBODY KNOWS IT NOW, IT WAS THE WORST KEPT FUCKING SECRET EVER, AND 2) EVEN IF THEY DIDN'T, IT'S JUST US HERE, AND OBVIOUSLY WE'VE BOTH ALREADY KNOWN IT ALL OUR LIVES
CCG: UNLESS WE'RE BOTH SO NEUROTIC WE ACTUALLY STILL WANT TO ACT LIKE ITS A SECRET WE'RE KEEPING FROM EACH OTHER...
CCG: BUT I'D LIKE TO THINK THE DAYS OF THAT ASTOUNDING DEGREE OF MENTAL ILLNESS ARE BEHIND US!
FCG: (I WANT TO KILL MYSELF, BUT I CAN'T UNTIL THE CONVERSATION RUNS ITS COURSE. THIS IS THE WORST HELL IMAGINABLE.)
CCG: SHUT THE FUCK UP. THAT'S THE EXACT KIND OF MELODRAMA I'M TALKING ABOUT, WE'RE BETTER THAN THAT NOW MAN.
CCG: I'M GONNA DO THE *MATURE* THING HERE: AND SWITCH MY TEXT TO RED.
CCG: THERE. I THINK THIS SHOULD BE THE UNIVERSAL CONVENTION FOR WHEN TWO OF THE SAME PEOPLE ARE TALKING TO EACH OTHER.
CCG: ONE GUY BITES THE BULLET AND TALKS IN RED.
CCG: SERIOUSLY, ONE OF US HAS TO BE THE GROWN UP HERE.
FCG: OH! I GET IT NOW.
FCG: WHEN I TYPE IN RED, IT'S SHOWY AND INSECURE, BUT WHEN YOU DO IT, YOU ARE SHOULDERING THE PRAGMATIC BURDEN OF A MARTYR, EVEN THOUGH IT WAS *MY* FUCKING IDEA TO DO THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE TEN MINUTES AGO!
FCG: YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
CCG: OK!!! GOD DAMMIT, STOP BEING SO SENSITIVE. I FUCKING APOLOGIZE.
FCG: CAN YOU JUST TALK ABOUT YOUR STUPID FEELINGS ALREADY SO WE CAN GET THIS NIGHTMARE OVER WITH.