undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering timaeusTestified [TT]

uu: HELLO DIRK IN THE PAST.
uu: LET'S PLAY A GAME.
TT: Alright.
uu: DO NOT EVEN FuCK WITH ME.
uu: I WANT TO PLAY A GAME WITH YOu. AND A GAME IS EXACTLY THAT WHICH WILL BE PLAYED BETWEEN uS.
TT: I said I'd play.
uu: DIRK. I WANT YOu TO DRAW ME SOME PORNOGRAPHY.
TT: You got it.
uu: IF YOu FAIL TO DRAW ME SOME PORNOGRAPHY.
uu: THERE WILL BE CONSEQuENCES.
uu: AND WHEN CONSEQuENCES HAPPEN. THAT IS WHEN BLOOD BEGINS TO FLOW.
uu: YOuR FuTuRE SELF SPENDS ALL HIS TIME BEING IN THE FuTuRE. HE PRIORITIZES BEING IN THE FuTuRE AND FIGHTING DRONES OVER PLAYING MY GAMES.
uu: YOuR PAST SELF SHOuLD CONSIDER THE COSTLY INDISCRETION OF YOuR FuTuRE SELF'S BEHAVIOR. BEHAVIOR WHICH ENTAILS BEING IN THE FuTuRE ALMOST AS MuCH AS NOT DOING WHATEVER I FuCKING TELL HIM TO.
TT: Dude, I'm sitting here with my stylus ready to go. Do you want me to draw you some porn or not.
uu: OH YES.
uu: YOu WILL DRAW ME MY PORNOGRAPHY, DIRK HuMAN STRIDER.
uu: I WILL HAVE MY POuND OF SMuT.
TT: ...
TT: I'm waiting.
uu: OR I WILL MuRDER MY SISTER.
TT: Gotcha.
TT: What'll it be.
uu: SHE WILL BE DEAD AND I WILL REJOICE WITH THE LIVELIEST LITTLE JIG YOu EVER SAW.
uu: HER PuTRID HARLEQuIN SLIME WILL LEAK FROM HER WOuNDS AND SOAK HER uGLY YELLOW ROBE.
uu: AND HER BODY. WILL BECOME A STuPID CORPSE.
uu: HER MOON BODY I MEAN.
uu: IT WILL MARK THE BEGINNING. AT LEAST.
uu: OF MY uLTIMATE VICTORY IN THIS GAME BETWEEN uS.
uu: BETWEEN ME AND HER. NOT ME AND YOu.
uu: DIRK LET'S PLAY A GAME.
TT: Dude, listen. I am perfectly willing to draw you some pornography.
TT: It doesn't need to be part of a game. You don't got to murder nobody.
uu: I WILL IF YOu DON'T DO WHAT I SAY.
uu: HOW VERY IRONIC. THAT A LIFE HANGS IN THE BALANCE. uPON YOuR WILLINGNESS TO DRAW ME SOME PORNOGRAPHY.
uu: THE VERY PORNOGRAPHY. WHICH YOu HAVE SPENT A LIFETIME DRAWING. IN YOuR SPARE TIME. BECAuSE YOu PRESuMABLY ENJOY DOING SO.
TT: How is that ironic?
uu: OH YES. HOW IRONIC IT IS INDEED.
uu: AND IT IS FuRTHER IRONIC. THAT THIS GAME IS IRONIC.
uu: IT IS THE VERY IRONY. WHICH YOu YOuRSELF HAVE SPENT A LIFETIME WALLOWING IN.
uu: AND uSING TO JuSTIFY INTERESTS AND BEHAVIORS. WHICH ARE DuMB AND CONFuSING.
TT: Whoa. Mindfuck.
TT: Seriously, should I just start drawing naked people or what.
uu: uH. NAKED PEOPLE?
TT: Yeah. Naked people doing it and stuff.
TT: You know. Porn.
uu: OH. NO.
uu: NO. NO. NO. NO. NO.
uu: AWFuL HORRIBLE BARF. NO. FuCK THAT NOISE.
uu: THERE WILL BE NO NuDITY.
uu: OR WHATEVER uNPLEASANT BEHAVIOR THAT PASSES FOR PROCREATIVE EXERCISE AMONG YOuR PEOPLE.
uu: WHAT I HAVE IN MIND IS SO MuCH MORE.
uu: SCANDALOuS.....
TT: Awesome.
TT: Lay it on me.