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04/06/16 - "[S] Collide."
04/02/16 - "[A6A6I5] ====>"

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[A6A6I5] ====>

|DIALOGLOG|
ROSE: This is the lightning round, Dave.
ROSE: We didn't make the rules.
ROSE: Anyway, I'm ready to blow my Referee's Sport Whistleâ„¢ if you don't answer before the Commercially Endorsed Game Clock expires.
DAVE: i think the lightning rounds over
DAVE: why dont we have a distraction to seal the deal
DAVE: hey mom i think harleydad over there is talkin about you
ROXY: jake?
ROXY: hehe yeah i think ur right
ROXY: gotta go catch up with him soon...
ROXY: ill wave hello for now
DAVE: i dont think hes noticing
ROXY: dammit jake look over here u goof
ROXY: gonna start a fire here will all this friendly wavin
DAVE: nope hes completely out to lunch
DAVE: just like all the harleyberts
ROXY: HIIIII JAKE
ROXY: JAKE
ROXY: JAKE DAMMIT HI
JAKE: Oh.
JAKE: Um sorry.
JAKE: H... hi roxy.
JAKE: Youre with us again and... and... i like that.
ROXY: :D
DAVE: thats it?
DAVE: hes right back at it with the bull guy
DAVE: whats with him
DAVE: he reminds me a lot of john but really quiet which is very unjohnish
ROXY: jakes great!
ROXY: but yeah hes not like that all the time
ROXY: he is p gregarious 1 on 1 but i guess he doesnt like crowds much
ROXY: he became sort of a hermit after a few months in our session
ROXY: he mainly hung out with dirk until he eventually sorta shut him out too
ROXY: dude just likes his lonesome time i guess?
DAVE: ill try gettin to know him some time
DAVE: maybe trap him like a shy woodland creature
DAVE: then brutally harangue him with my typically rad shit and become airtight bros
DAVE: right there in the fucking woods
DAVE: exactly how nature intended
ROXY: omg yes
ROXY: i will help u rig your jakesnares
ROXY: maybe leave some hunky dudebait, like a trail of microshorts sprinkled thru out the forest
DAVE: awesome thanks mom
DAVE: roxy i mean
ROSE: Dave, even I'm having less trouble referring to Roxy by her name consistently, and I was the one who grew up knowing her as my literal mother.
ROSE: What is going on with you?
DAVE: nothing
DAVE: its just like semi accidentally replacing a word with another word in a majority of instances
DAVE: why do you need to read things into everything
ROSE: You're right. How could anyone possibly read anything into that sort of repeated slip-up.
DAVE: exactly
ROSE: What if you're making her uncomfortable?
ROXY: its fine really!
ROXY: i think it is sorta endearing
DAVE: see rose yall worrying about nothing as usual
DAVE: moms fine with it
DAVE: moxy
ROXY: snort
DAVE: i mean
DAVE: romy
DAVE: mommy
DAVE: wait fuck
DAVE: ok that one was fucked up
DAVE: lets make sure i never ever fucking say that again
ROXY: im dyin here
ROXY: dave...stoppit
ROXY: im a sphyxiate
DAVE: i cant
DAVE: its like i was saying before
DAVE: this is a force of nature we all gotta just deal with
DAVE: striders blurtscapades
DAVE: daves flying boner circus
DAVE: this shit is immutable
DAVE: i had to face this fact a long time ago
DAVE: i could either try to change that part of myself which is an unwinnable war
DAVE: or i could try focusing on being like a vaguely half decent person so at least the shit i inevitably blurt out from deep down isnt all that bad
DAVE: because the bad stuff has been and is still being purged through an arduous long term process of complete and utter humiliation
ROXY: man
ROXY: arduous long term processes of complete and utter humiliation are basically my aesthetic
ROXY: anyways you are a silly dude and its ok if u keep callin me mom on "accident" :)
ROSE: I hope it is similarly ok with you if I make the conscious decision to refrain from calling you that ever.
ROSE: Unlike Dave, I've taken great pride in the meticulous maintenance of my internal filter.
ROSE: I don't think I have the same luxury he does.
ROSE: Humiliation just makes my demons angrier.
ROXY: yeah rose call me whatev!
ROXY: but um lmao you got a way of makin that sound legit scary
DAVE: its fucked up that shes joking but also not even really
DAVE: youll figure out how to crack her deadpan riddles theres an art to it
ROXY: you guys...
ROXY: an ur friggin psycho babble!
ROXY: its a riot
ROXY: suddenly feelin like maybe im the weak link in this family tree on the analytical front
ROXY: need to step up my game
ROSE: To be fair, Dave's game is pretty flimsy.
ROSE: He's been jacking my swagger for years. He only pulls it off because he's funny.
ROSE: And to be even fairer, I'm not actually much of a psychoanalyst.
ROSE: I know just enough to know that I barely know anything, and probably would have benefited from, I don't know, "college", or something.
ROXY: ok whew i feel a bit less lame then
ROXY: i remember dirks insane scrutinization of all things cerebral had a similar way of dwarfing ones ego
ROXY: maybe that was smoke in mirrors too idk
ROXY: maybe since he and i are ur parents, in terms of psycho skillz...
ROXY: hes got ALL genes and i got NONE
ROXY: so that means dave got SOME genes and rose got LOTS??
ROXY: wherein SOME is more than NONE and LOTS is less than ALL
ROXY: ???
ROSE: That's quite a scientific way of looking at it.
ROSE: Maybe it's even true?
ROXY: yeah i fuken LOVE SCIENCE!!!
DAVE: ok then that explains everything
ROXY: what
DAVE: if you got all the science genes then that means some scraped off on me
DAVE: which would explain why my beats are so ill
DAVE: its cause my science is off the charts
ROSE: Holy shit.
ROSE: Can someone come push this nerd off the lilypad?
ROXY: dat explanation tho
ROXY: :')
ROSE: Cringeworthy rap notwithstanding,
ROSE: I do recall hearing him babble about wanting to be a scientist on more than one occasion.
ROSE: If the world hadn't ended.
ROSE: What was it? Archeology? Paleontology?
DAVE: yeah i dunno
DAVE: one of those things
DAVE: whichever involved more dead shit
DAVE: maybe
ROXY: paleontology!!
ROXY: u wanted to study that?
DAVE: i sincerely mumbled about the idea once or twice sure
ROXY: thats neat
ROXY: what about you rose
ROXY: did u actually want to be a legit psychiatrist and go to school for that and all?
ROSE: I don't recall my thoughts on higher education.
ROSE: My passion for the subject I think was more a contrivance of a very young girl with misplaced conviction in her abilities.
ROSE: I probably thought I could just figure it all out myself and skip the academic coronation.
ROSE: I don't think much about it anymore.
ROSE: Possibly because there's no one left to analyze, except for the modest population of this frog disc.
ROXY: what would you want to do with your life instead?
ROXY: i mean assuming there were no more evildoers to worry about
ROSE: I don't know.
ROSE: What is there even to consider doing with godhood BUT concern oneself with evildoers?
DAVE: what about your quest
ROSE: Hm?
DAVE: the shit with your planet and the rain and stuff
DAVE: wasnt there still something to do there
ROSE: I... guess so?
ROXY: yeah
ROXY: i did mine!
ROXY: or at least a version of it specific to my situation
ROXY: i get the feelin they change around and such depending on what the lay of the land is
ROXY: my reality was fucked so my denizen just kinda... rerouted me
ROXY: nothin too fancy
DAVE: yeah exactly
DAVE: i did this really stilted like mashup of what i assume my "real quest" was
DAVE: like involving breaking a sword and UNbreaking a sword and a fuckin BIRD was involved and then the bird unceremoniously DIED somewhere
DAVE: it was kind of a mess
DAVE: like me i guess so maybe that made sense
DAVE: who knows what yours would have in store for you now
DAVE: i mean
DAVE: if you even wanted to bother
ROSE: I'm not sure if I have the inclination, and realistically, there isn't even much time for that, is there?
ROSE: We're supposed to be fighting adversaries imminently.
ROSE: I can't squeeze it in before the battle.
ROSE: And after, we'll have supposedly "won", so what would even be the point of doing it then?
DAVE: shrug
ROSE: Something always rubbed me the wrong way about "My Quest".
ROSE: I don't even like the phrase. It's uncomfortably formal, and a little foreboding.
ROSE: I think the regimentation of it all always struck me as unpalatable.
ROSE: Like consigning personal growth to the completion of a glorified, myth-heavy rat maze.
DAVE: yeah i know why you feel that way
DAVE: youve got big problems with authority
DAVE: you always have and you probably wouldnt even put it that way cause it sounds really Teen of you and gauche or whatever
DAVE: but its true
ROXY: omg u guys and your shrink babble!
ROXY: is so funny i swear 2 god
DAVE: yeah here we go again right?
DAVE: except just remember im a fraud at this stuff
DAVE: except in this particular case im totally right
DAVE: she sees this quest all neatly laid out for her wrapped in a bow
DAVE: fuck it even looks like its made for little kids with like pink turtles and rainbows and shit
DAVE: like here you go princess its babys first quest
DAVE: almost like it was designed to piss her off
DAVE: sburb says here, self improvement delineated and made comprehensible enjoy your cookie cutter odyssey
DAVE: so because shes rose she goes no fuck my quest
DAVE: literally starts wrecking shit
DAVE: and maybe that itself was always her quest
VRISKA: If I may interject...
DAVE: oh awesome vriska was eavesdropping
VRISKA: Not for very long!
VRISKA: I just heard you talking a8out Rose's quest is all.
VRISKA: I don't have any opinion on whether you do it or not, Rose. That's your 8usiness.
VRISKA: 8ut my advice is, if you see your denizen, just make sure you kill her fast.
DAVE: what
VRISKA: 8elieve me, Cetus is a HUGE 8itch.
VRISKA: If you give her an inch, she'll try to sucker you into a whole 8oring convers8tion, mostly involving a 8unch of curmudgeonly riddles.
VRISKA: Don't give her the chance! Just go for the jugular and end it as soon as you can.
VRISKA: Gra8 her loot and call it a day. That's what I think, at least.
VRISKA: Assuming you 8other going to see her at all. Couldn't really 8lame you if you didn't though.
ROSE: I probably won't.
ROSESPRITE: Won't what?
VRISKA: Oh now what the FUCK is this????????
JASPERSPRITE: Meow.

> [A6A6I5] ====>


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RSS: Adventure Updates

Posted on 27 November 2017 by Andrew



Posted on 11 November 2017 by Andrew



Hey check it out. Every week we'll be revealing some new troll characters from Hiveswap until Act 2 is out. Follow the Troll Call here, and meet the first two here. Expect a few more surprises like this to drop in coming weeks.

Posted on 14 September 2017 by Andrew

Hiveswap has been released. You should go play it!





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