DAVE: i wonder if he had like DAVE: friends DIRK: It sounds like he knew a lot of people, at least later in life. DAVE: sure DAVE: i mean im sure he knew rose at some point because obviously they teamed up DAVE: but as fairly old people? DAVE: it sounds as though they only knew each other as a result of their notability DIRK: This seems likely. DAVE: i mean more like the friends i grew up with DAVE: he couldnt have grown up with john or jade as friends because they were already old by the time he got there DAVE: this cool 80s kid fantasy was probably just a lot lonelier than ive been picturing in my sweet daydreams DAVE: i didnt even have the MAYOR god what a nightmare now that i think about it DAVE: i wonder if all he cared about was making ludicrous shit and fighting evil pastry moguls DAVE: do you know if he had any other interests DIRK: Like what? DAVE: i dont know DAVE: did you ever read any urban legends about..... DAVE: paleontology DIRK: Paleontology? DAVE: yes the scientific study of dead shit DIRK: Not that I recall. DAVE: hmm DAVE: i guess he probably didnt do anything with that DAVE: what a shame DAVE: maybe he never even got the idea since he had completely different experiences DAVE: but if i were suddenly dropped back in the 20th century id probably look into it at some point DAVE: i dunno how though DAVE: i think it would be mainly like DAVE: some sort of theraputic interest DAVE: something relaxing to think about instead of a bunch of ironic and stupidly ambitious objectives DIRK: Yeah, like the porn bots. DAVE: yeah exactly DIRK: Maybe some day, when we're both old men, you can live a quiet life tending to your fossils, and I will do the same with my dear collection of simple-minded chat robots fixated on puppet ass. DAVE: sounds like the fucking life to me DIRK: What was the lightning round question this stemmed from again? DIRK: I forget. DAVE: dunno DAVE: maybe were tapering off with the lightning round stuff anyway and its just naturally deteriorating into regular dudechat DIRK: Maybe. DIRK: You sure you don't have anything else before we say it's officially deteriorated? DAVE: k heres a curveball DAVE: what the fuck are you wearing DIRK: My prince gear. DIRK: You know. Leggings, slippers, the poofy asshole pants, a hood with some sort of cloth tiara deal embedded in it. DIRK: Basic stuff for princes, apparently. DAVE: huh DAVE: gotta say DAVE: some of these god tier ensembles really are... DAVE: something DIRK: I thought I hated it at first. DIRK: But over the couple hours I spent flying back, with time to think about all sorts of stuff... DIRK: It kinda grew on me. DIRK: The asshole pants are pretty damn comfortable, so I dunno if I even care how stupid they look. DIRK: And I *am* kind of an asshole, after all. So who am I to complain. DAVE: i thought the same thing about my cape outfit at first DAVE: felt like some bozo from the renaissance festival DAVE: like maybe i should get on a horse and sing a shitty ballad DAVE: but then it grew on me pretty quickly DAVE: hardly ever took it off in three years DAVE: youre right its comfortable and theyre fuckin magic pajamas or whatever and they start to feel like part of who you are after long enough DAVE: i mean they are supposed to last you forever right DAVE: kinda by definition since they come along with immortality DAVE: maybe part of their magical nature includes this insidious quality where they grow on you DAVE: or not i dunno maybe this is bullshit and ill just wear some normal person clothes when this is all over DAVE: what about you are you gonna wear god duds forever DIRK: Nah. I'm sure I'll wear regular stuff again at some point. DIRK: If a shirt with a hat on it can be deemed regular. DAVE: im cool with deeming it as such DAVE: yeah maybe youre right and we should all stop dressing like tools from an infinite magic slumber party for floundering teens DAVE: and just look like standard floundering teens DAVE: some of the getups are pretty out there DAVE: jakes tho... DAVE: uh DAVE: damn?? DIRK: I... DIRK: Yeah. DIRK: That page costume. DIRK: I'd have commented on it, except that would've been casting a stone through a particularly fragile glass wardrobe. DIRK: So... I just flew away. DAVE: yeah there was uh DAVE: some palpable awkwardness there DIRK: Hm. DAVE: sorry im still DAVE: tryin to DAVE: like DAVE: wrap my head around DAVE: ... DIRK: What? DAVE: uh DAVE: dammit DAVE: ok i guess i might have to break one of our lightning round rules DAVE: only a little tho DAVE: i hope DIRK: About what? DIRK: The personal stuff? DAVE: yeah DIRK: That's fine. DAVE: ok maybe im not even asking you anything DAVE: maybe this is just a starting point to ramble to myself DAVE: on a certain topic DAVE: i think... DAVE: there is a SLIGHT chance... DAVE: i may be the biggest idiot in the world DIRK: ? DAVE: when it comes to understanding some things about my bro DAVE: some pieces i never really put together DAVE: about him DAVE: until maybe literally right now DAVE: which i think makes me an objective dumbass DIRK: What does this have to do with me and Jake? DAVE: idk DAVE: nothin DAVE: maybe i dont wanna ask you anything about jake DAVE: maybe ill just keep abiding by the code of basic dude manners on that DAVE: if i bother skirtin the line of this rule maybe id rather ask you other stuff instead DIRK: Like what? DAVE: like DAVE: um DAVE: say one of your best friends is a knucklehead you havent seen in three years DAVE: and unless you use ultra direct and explicit language he just wont put two and two together himself DAVE: and also say ANOTHER best friend is a girl you feel like you had kind of a special relationship with but you ALSO hadnt seen in three years DAVE: and shes asleep DAVE: but at some point shell wake up and youll have to talk to her DIRK: ... DAVE: this is dumb im not making any sense DAVE: lemme start over DAVE: ok lets say DAVE: way back whenever DAVE: howww DAVE: ... DAVE: how did you tell your friends
Here's another huge deal announcement. A "bomb shell", you could say. The zodiac has officially been extended to include 288 signs, instead of the meager assortment of 12 you are familiar with. The resulting system is known as the Extended Zodiac. You may determine your True Sign by taking a test, if you wish.
I envisioned an expansion like this a couple years ago, when it became clear that due to the large volume of NPCs in Hiveswap, many new troll symbols would have to be created. So we made a large library of symbols to draw from when designing characters (A lot more symbols than characters. Don't worry, the game roster isn't THAT out of control.) But why stop at just a static library of new signs when you could take the opportunity to reinvent astrology itself?
The test uses a couple other personal classifiers from Homestuck lore to triangulate your True Sign designation from this dizzying barrage of iconography. What do you do with this information? I don't know. Make some cool new OCs? Discuss your new sign with friends? Cause great agitation and bewilderment among astrological purists? The sky's the limit. Also, those invested in what qualifies as "canon" when it comes to Homestuck lore may take interest in this test, which formally evaluates whether you are a Prospit or Derse Dreamer (involving a new term of art for the sake of this system, called Lunar Sway), as well as your Aspect. I am sure some will wonder whether this means a God Tier Class test will be available as well. Some day, yes, probably. For now, only Aspect is applicable to this system. But the precedent now exists for the expectation to be CANONICALLY classified by literally any absurd profiling system I have ever concocted, and you have just obtained a full license to not let anyone forget this.
Here's a very special new book made by me, dril, and KC Green, which you can preorder here. This seemed like a good way to do it since we had no idea how many of these books to print. A hundred? A million? ZERO??? You guys will decide. Plus there's a lot of other cool stuff there. If you have any interest in this book at all, it's probably a good idea for you to jump on it now. There's no telling how easy it will be to get your hands on after the first run has shipped to backers.
About the friends who helped out: my guess is you are probably familiar with dril's twitter brand? A couple years ago we talked about working on this, one thing led to another, and now here we are asking you to buy a book with a spoon concealed inside of it. The way I see it is, you don't just get any clown off the street to write for characters with the complexity and emotional depth that these ones have. You bring out the big guns. This is a man who knows his way around a huge ass. A man who knows all too well the plight of the gamer. A man who won't hesitate to engage with some of your favorite brands, and will not flinch at a longform narrative about a pissed off guy searching the world for his spoon.
KC Green has already done some good work with the SBaHJ franchise, you may remember. For the sake of authenticity I did a lot of coloring work over his pencils and put some serious attention on generally screwing everything up. Don't worry, we had some very important standards of quality that I took great care to ensure we catastrophically failed to meet. KC does a lot of other great stuff too. Did you know he did the dog who says this is fine even though the room is on fire? It's crazy how much people love that damn dog. Not everyone knows he did it though, and people should applaud him more for his stuff. Same with dril. Let's hear it for these boys and their priceless contributions to our society. I hope you like this book!
Hey check it out. Every week we'll be revealing some new troll characters from Hiveswap until Act 2 is out. Follow the Troll Call here, and meet the first two here. Expect a few more surprises like this to drop in coming weeks.
Hiveswap has been released. You should go play it!
Huge thanks to the entire What Pumpkin Games team for all their hard work on this project. Everyone involved has much to be proud of. Personally, I think the game is VERY GOOD! Really, better than I imagined it would be when scribbling notes for it years ago. Credit is owed to the fans for their patience while the necessary time was taken to build a studio capable of making a game like this. And above all, credit is owed to the great team that brought it to life. If you happen to spot any contributors out in the wild, on social media or such, I hope you will extend your appreciation for what they have accomplished.
What Pumpkin and Homestuck are partnering with Viz Media to work on a lot of cool stuff together in the future. This will include projects based on both the Homestuck and Hiveswap worlds. The possibilities are wide open, but here are a couple examples of things we know we're going to work on already...
Viz will begin releasing the Homestuck books again, starting next year. These will be nice new hardcover editions, and the plan is to just keep turning out volumes until the entire story is in print. Each volume will be full of my Secret Notes just like the previous ones were. Viz will also be involved in the release of the mysterious epilogue project I alluded to a while ago. Details on format, release date, etc, will remain undisclosed until further notice, but you can expect more information about that to surface next year too. I wanted to do something a little unusual for it, something existing outside the confines of the web story. Working with Viz struck me as good opportunity for this.
Aside from that, anything can happen. Take a look at the sorts of things Viz has already published or produced. These are all examples of things on the table for future consideration for either Homestuck or Hiveswap. I've got plenty of ideas, and so do they. Maybe you do too??