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Examine room.

Your name is DIRK.

Holy SHIT do you love PUPPETS.

You possess the extreme dexterity to operate your FALSE FRIENDS UNSEEN, that is, when they are not pre-ambulatory through your LOVINGLY IMBUED MECHANIZATION. You dig writing COGNITIVE ALGORITHMS FOR SAID APOCRYPHAL MEN, and you think maybe that's FUCKIN' DOPE. Guess what else is dope? Everything ELSE YOU DO. You're a sickwicked autodidact on ANCIENT CIVILIZATIONS, a selfmade MASTER OF MYTHOLOGUE, and a PRETERNATURAL POPCULTURE ACADEME.

If you weren't so DAMN ALOOF and actually let people GET A LOAD, you might get described all kindsa ways. Maybe tagged as a RENAISSANCE NINJA, PHILOSOPHER PRINCE, and FLASHSTEP PUPPETEER. Or perhaps a PANTHEONIC IRONICIST, GANGSTA LOGICIAN, LUCID WAKER and DERSITE SPY. Screw descriptors though, as if the shits you give ain't nil. You're cool with dabbling in the FINE SEQUENTIAL ARTS, and your work could be viewed by some as BORDERLINE PORNOGRAPHIC. And to those philistines you'll be heard wondering, what the fuck do you mean BORDERLINE?

Against the better judgment of one your age, you BUILD ROBOTS, SET THEM TO KILL MODE, AND SPAR WITH THEM TO DEATH. That is, when you're not SENDIFICATING THEM TO FRIENDS, or DUELING THEM WITH RAP LYRICS. But you try to cool it on the deathmatch stuff when your BRO is looking, which is virtually NEVER. And considering he's had a reputation staked on some order of MARTIAL NOBILITY, this strikes you as a STAGGERING OVERSIGHT IN BROTHERLY VIGILANCE. You don't have the HEART to hold it against him, though.

What will you do?

> Dirk: Jut your ass and twitch like a proboscis.


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RSS: Adventure Updates

Posted on 27 July 2015 by Andrew

That was the last update for a good while. I'll say more about the pause soon.

The flash: song was an old and good one by Malcolm Brown, whose name I'd hope you would be familiar with by now. Art contributed by Adrienne, Ikimaru, Guzusuru, Shelby, and Rah. Great to work with all these people again. As has always been the case, the enthusiasm for the story by all contributors really shows in the work they do, and makes the final animation result feel a lot more special than it otherwise would be. A big thanks to all these artists, along with anyone else who ever left their artistic mark on this story.

Posted on 23 July 2015 by Andrew

9828 had a song and a drawing by James Roach and Ipgd respectively. Whoa, those are respectively very very good. The doomsday screed is by this son of a bozo, and it does appear to have motivated quite a STRONG wave of selfie posting. Maybe enough to even save the website from old man Hussie? Guess we'll find out. Hmm, sure does seem like Homestuck has a lot of good lookin' readers. I must say I am impressed. I have taken quite an extensive tour through your offerings and I have yet to find an unattractive face in front of Arquiusprite's tremendous buttocks. Kudos to every single selfie-snapper for being so preposterously photogenic. Just, wow. People have got a couple tumblr archives already if you want to take a look. I don't know which of those is "better," or more exhaustive, but you know what, a little competition never killed anybody. I guess they can be like the Coke and Pepsi of this baloney ass stunt, for as long as people wanna keep pointing phones at their own faces.

Posted on 2 July 2015 by Andrew



Here is an announcement!

Starting now, We Love Fine will become the primary seller of Homestuck products. Almost everything from the What Pumpkin store will be gradually moved over to the We Love Fine store over the next few weeks. We're also working on a lot of cool new things, which will show up in the WLF store over the following months.

WLF is also running another shirt design contest this month. There were a whole lot of great entries last time, and many of them ended up getting printed. Maybe YOU have a cool idea for a shirt this time around?? I would like to see it!

In closing, I will say this. We Love Fine is a great company! I've worked with them for a couple years already. The people there are VERY enthusiastic about making great stuff for fandoms. Take a look around their site. There's a good chance you will see stuff for other properties you like as well. I'm looking forward to seeing what else they're going to make for Homestuck!



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